Advice, Being Single And Happy, Dating and Relationships, Self Improvement

Walk Away From Toxic Situations To Help Humanity

Some of us grew up with examples of staying in toxic situations.

Some of us were told we would be lonely if we didn’t forgive and keep people in our life, even though they were toxic.

Some of us thought toxicity was normal because that is how we were raised and what we experienced.

The people that raised us didn’t know any better, it is what they learned too.

It’s time to change that.

Stop going from one toxic relationship to the next.

Just stop, be with yourself, heal and learn better ways to be in relationship.

Raise your standards and do not accept mistreatment. It is not normal like we were raised to think.

If we continue this cycle, we hand it down to our children, and they suffer.  We don’t want that.

If many raise our standards, it helps the abusive people learn they cannot treat people this way and it will be more difficult to find someone that will put up with their abusive behavior.

Maybe then they will see what they are doing and change their ways.

But we don’t do it to change them, we do it to live a much better life. A life with people that love and care about us and wouldn’t think of hurting us intentionally.

We also do it to help humanity. To teach people to be kind and love.

When we do this in our own lives, we show and teach all the people in our circle to live with kindness, love and integrity, and who knows how far that can spread.

Maybe the world would be a much better place to live just by loving ourselves and not tolerating mistreatment.

Yes, there is a place for forgiveness.  Sometimes it is just to move on with your life without bitterness but without that person. Sometimes it is to give someone another chance, if they show they’ve made effort to change their abusive ways.

For those of us that grew up in toxic situations, take time to heal and learn how to be in healthy relationships. Don’t entertain new relationships until you know you’re in a healthier place.

~ Monica

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15 thoughts on “Walk Away From Toxic Situations To Help Humanity”

  1. wise advice .. we need to have strong boundaries around toxic people and situations!
    this includes physical/verbal violence, put downs, gossip mongers, slander .. healthier to put distance between you until they take responsibility for their behaviour

    Liked by 1 person

  2. So true! Self love, self respect and self care are so very important. Taking care of ourselves is essential in order to cultivate a bond that is healthy for us and for the partner. If we dont have courage to walk away from a situation that doesn’t serve us the respect we deserve, we are harming ourselves and giving the other person the idea that it’s okay to treat us poorly, so that they will keep being more abusive whenever they want.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. amen sista – I was thinking that myself last night, when I had that night of peace I woke up in peace. I much needed it – I texted the lady who ran the quilt retreat and apologized how it was a bust, and my part how I was dealing with a lot and I knew they were too – and just said no bad blood and moving forward. I felt better.
    They read it, but no response but that is okay 🙂 I want to be part of something, but this aint it, I left my phone in the car on purpose to get away from the toxic.
    Next step – letting go, and just let be peace. I have so much stress and anxiety, I need to start simplifying
    well said friend. ❤ (sending viral hug)

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Your comment about leaving your phone in the car. My phone’s ringer has been off for 3 weeks and I only check it periodically. Sometimes we have to do that for ourselves if someone’s contact or non-contact is going to send us into anxiety. And sometimes we have to let people go and move on for our own good. It can be really hard when we are forgiving and can see the other person’s side… but if we know things aren’t going to change and we aren’t going to be treated well, it’s time to let go and move on. Hugs back to you. It’s hard dealing with difficult people.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I actually feel pretty good after leaving the phone in the car, I came back home from Lakewood about 1 pm today, and I left my phone in the car again 🙂 chris just got home, if its a emergency he will get a message if need be. I will bring my phone in tomorrow night to charge but I just really wanna cut back on that. it gives me anxiety to carry on over phone sometimes, I think the weekend would be best to limit my time on it. BTW my mom is STILL playing lillys garden shes way past 30 days

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Me too. I’ll leave my phone in another room with the ringer off hoping I’ll miss it if the people I’m having trouble with call or text. I haven’t been playing the game, or any games and trying to spend my time on things I’ve been wanting to get done.

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  4. I learned to that is no use in spending time around toxic family members who continually drag me down. I also learned to keep private matters to myself. Just because a person is family doesn’t mean they have earned the right to have me open up. As a Christian forgiveness is what I live by but that doesn’t mean I have to allow myself to be emotionally abuse. I can’t change them. I can only pray for them. Even when this family member hurts me with actions that are so blatantly wrong and mean, I must learn to respond in love and be the bigger person.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I agree – spending time around anyone that continually drags us down can really mess up our lives. It sucks energy that could be used in a positive way for ourselves or someone that needs us.

      I also learned to not tell everything to family members that might use things against me. One in particular wants me to always follow his ‘supreme’ advice. I like advice from people but this one does it in a way that always demeans me or the way I’m doing things.

      You are right, we can’t change them. We can only change ourselves, and part of that for me, is learning it’s ok for me to walk away from this and protect my well-being.

      If you ever need support in your situation, I’m here. Thank-you for your comments – it helps to connect with others that go through this.

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